Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
