You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
