you would pick up someone in the library
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Randomize