dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
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