so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize