Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
