I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Randomize
