we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Randomize
