ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize