why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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