I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
