ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
birth control should be required to get into college
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Randomize
