Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
her vagine was all disorganized.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
