YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
