Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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