I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
