How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Randomize
