Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
