aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
