He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
