I saw his package. It spoke to me.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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