so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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