also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
