So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
