Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize