did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
