I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
