I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
