I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i will never coherently bang her
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
