When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize
