I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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