it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
