We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize
