It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Randomize
