its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
