he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
