I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
