we have officially lost it.
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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