i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
