i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
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