So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
