I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Randomize