She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
this will be a night to untag.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize