I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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