So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
we should paint friendship bongs
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