We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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