Don't you send me to vm
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
