Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
be right there i have to get my cape
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize