hotel room ftw
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
