Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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